I was shattered from work, I was wearing my 3rd pair of boots this year, I got there later than usual and didn’t have time for my normal warm up. There’s my excuses, where are yours Whites?

It was 7 vs 8. We tossed for first pick/extra man. I chose heads and won. I went for the extra man and the steady keeper that is Ross Cornquiff.

I’ll first summarise the game is terms of quality. The Yellows were the better team, Laurie put in a solid performance in his first game back from injury. Brian maintained his recent good form and Gary, the scorer of 4 goals, need I say more. In fact all Yellows had a good game with the exception of Sylvain. He was merd. The Whites on the other hand were lack luster. We never really got going. Richie was probably our best player based purely on the fact that he is fat and didn’t do enough to do anything wrong.

I’ll secondly summarise the game in terms of events.

Dave O opened the scoring with a decent low drive past Bartez. 1-0. The Whites started well

5 minutes Gary took a shot that was heading straight for the quiff. Richie tried to block. Deflection 1-1

5 minutes later Ben, who was having a good game, performed an exquisite turn on the left touch line. The Yellows called it out, it was 50/50. The Yellow took the throw

5 minutes later the two brothers clashed on the right touch line, it went out for a throw. It was 50/50. The Yellows called it. The Yellows took the throw. Consequently, Jonny whipped in a delightful ball into the box and Gary scored with a great header. Neil was rightly aggrieved 3-1

5 minutes later, Jay and Ali clashed on the right touch line, it went out for a throw. It was 50/50. The Yellows called it. The Yellow took the throw. I scratched my bollocks

5 minutes later Nick found himself with plenty of time at left back. He turned inside, saw Gary in the centre and delivered a worldie pass. Gary tapped in 4-1

1 second later, the Whites gave up

5 minutes later Ross found himself with plenty of time at left back. He turned inside, passed the ball to Jonny who found Gary at the far post 5-1

5 minutes later Richie asked permission to go up front. I like that he knows who the daddy is. He quickly found a bit of time and space and put a good left footer past the keeper. Not bad at all for last pick 5-2

It was a night to forget for the Whites with a performance more worrying than corona virus. Never the less, some awful banter and excellent perving in the pub made the night all worth while

xxx