Before the game, in the changing room, Tom asked if I wanted to be captain this week — which I gladly accepted as Pete volunteered to go in goal, which meant I wouldn’t have to.

When it came to picking teams, I offered Bren first pick, but he quickly offered it back. I’ve got a feeling that was less about good sportsmanship and more about dodging this match report.

The Yellows started off in a diamond formation up top and got off to a flying start. Jamie and Reuben both found the net early to put us 2–0 up, setting the tone for the night. We kept creating chances, but Bren was pulling off save after save to keep the Whites in the game.

The Whites nearly pulled one back when Andy found himself clean through on goal — but Pete, with a dodgy hamstring and all, came charging out to put him off. Brave… or reckless. Either way, it worked.

Soon enough, 2–0 became 4–0 as the Yellows kept the ball moving nicely, opening up spaces and punishing the Whites. Ed played up front for the Whites as they tried to change their formation, channelling his inner Harry Maguire as a makeshift striker, but there was no stopping the Yellows.

A contender for moment of the match came when Jamie played a gorgeous long pass out to Reuben on the right channel. Reuben brought it down expertly, whipped in a dangerous ball across goal… and Tom somehow missed from about two yards out. Could’ve been goal of the night!

By full time, the Yellows had put five past Bren in a dominant display. Everyone played their part — goals, assists, and plenty of running. Anthony was a rock at the back, he swears he’s a CDM but at "almost" 50yrs old, that’s basically a defender.

This week’s Man of the Match for me goes to Mike, for a great all-round performance  in attack and defence.